Poems and Readings for a Funeral Program

Two things to know before choosing. First, one reading is usually enough — a panel with three poems on it reads as a panel with none. Second, and almost nobody mentions this: printing two hundred copies is publishing, and a good deal of the verse that circulates as "traditional funeral poetry" is still in copyright.

Quiet and consoling

• "Crossing the Bar" — Alfred, Lord Tennyson, 1889. The sea as a crossing rather than an ending. Works especially well for someone who lived near water or served at sea.
• "Remember" — Christina Rossetti, 1862. A sonnet that gives the living permission to forget a little: "Better by far you should forget and smile / Than that you should remember and be sad."
• "Death is nothing at all" — Henry Scott Holland, 1910. Taken from a sermon rather than written as a poem, which is why it reads as speech.
• "Because I could not stop for Death" — Emily Dickinson. Composed and unhurried; better read aloud slowly than skimmed on a page.

Scripture

All safe to print. The King James text is public domain; modern translations are not necessarily, so if you use one, check with the church or use the KJV wording.

• Psalm 23 — the most-read passage at funerals, and still the right choice for many families.
• Ecclesiastes 3:1–8 — "a time to be born, and a time to die". Widely recognised, and gentle for a mixed congregation.
• John 14:1–3 — "In my Father's house are many mansions."
• Romans 8:38–39 — nothing can separate us from love.
• Revelation 21:4 — "and God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes". Short enough to sit under a photograph.
• Psalm 121 — "I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills."

For a long life, well lived

• "Requiem" — Robert Louis Stevenson, 1887. "Home is the sailor, home from the sea, / And the hunter home from the hill." Six lines, and it suits someone who worked outdoors or travelled.
• "To Autumn" — John Keats, 1820. Not a funeral poem, which is exactly why it works: ripeness and completion rather than loss.
• "Sonnet 18" — Shakespeare. Usually read as a love poem; at the funeral of a long marriage it is one.

For a child or a short life

Handle this differently. Long verse asks a room to hold composure it may not have, and the grand consolations of Victorian poetry can land badly on a family in this situation.

• "On My First Son" — Ben Jonson, 1616. Written by a father, and it does not attempt to console.
• A single verse of scripture rather than a passage — Revelation 21:4 or Matthew 19:14.
• Something they liked. A few lines from a book that was read to them is often truer than any poem about death. Check the copyright before printing it.

Non-religious

• "Crossing the Bar" and "Requiem" both work without any religious framing.
• "Nothing Gold Can Stay" — Robert Frost, 1923. Eight lines about impermanence, with no afterlife in it.
• Their own words. A letter, a card, a note they wrote. Nothing you choose will be more theirs, and there is no permission to seek.

Choosing between them

Read the candidates aloud. Verse that looks composed on a screen can be unreadable through tears, and the person doing the reading has to get through it in front of a room. If it will be printed rather than read, length matters less — but on a folded panel, anything past about sixteen lines starts to crowd out the photographs.