Military Honors at a Funeral

Every eligible veteran is entitled to military funeral honors, at no cost to the family. A surprising number of families never ask — either because they do not know it is available, or because they assume it must be arranged months ahead. Neither is true.

What honors include

The legal minimum is two uniformed service members, the folding and presentation of the flag, and the sounding of Taps. A fuller rendering, where a detail or honor guard is available, may add:

• Presentation of the colors
• The national anthem
• Reading of the military service record — branch, years served, rank.
• Rifle volley — three rounds fired by a detail.
• Sounding of Taps — a live bugler where one is available.
• Folding and presentation of the flag — to the next of kin, with the words of presentation.
• A moment of silence

Who is eligible

Broadly: military members who died on active duty, veterans who served and were not dishonorably discharged, and certain members of the Reserve and National Guard. Eligibility is established with a discharge document, usually a DD Form 214.

If you cannot find one, say so early rather than assuming it rules honors out. Copies can be requested from the National Archives, and funeral directors do this regularly.

How to request them

Through the funeral director. This is the part families get wrong by trying to do it themselves: the director contacts the relevant service branch on your behalf, as routine. Tell them at the first meeting, and bring the discharge paperwork if you have it.

Availability of a full detail varies by region and by how much notice there is. A live bugler in particular is not guaranteed — many services use a ceremonial bugle that plays a recording, which sounds correct from where the family is sitting.

Where it goes in the program

Honors belong inside the order of service rather than as an appendix, and they go before the recessional — the recessional stays the last word of the service.

Seven entries is a lot of vertical space on a folded panel. Set two-up in columns they cost about four lines instead of seven, which is usually what decides whether the rest of the order still fits.

What the family receives

• The burial flag. Provided at no cost by the Department of Veterans Affairs, one for each veteran. The funeral director normally obtains it. After the service it is folded and presented, and the family keeps it. It cannot be replaced if it is lost, so decide who will look after it before the day.
• A Presidential Memorial Certificate. A certificate bearing the president's signature, honoring the veteran's service. More than one copy can be requested, so that each child or sibling may have one.
• A headstone, marker or medallion. Eligible veterans may receive one at no cost, including for a grave in a private cemetery.

Ask the funeral director about all three at the same meeting. They are separate requests, and the second and third are often missed because nobody mentions them.

Who receives the flag

The flag is presented to the next of kin, which usually means the spouse, then the children, then the parents. Settle who that will be before the service and tell the funeral director. The person presenting will walk to them and kneel, so they need to be seated in the front row where they can be reached.

The words of presentation are the same in every branch:

On behalf of the President of the United States, the United States Army, and a grateful nation, please accept this flag as a symbol of our appreciation for your loved one's honorable and faithful service.

The name of the branch changes to match the veteran's own.

How much notice is needed

Ask as soon as the date is set. Two to three days is the usual minimum for the two-person detail. A rifle volley or a color guard takes longer to arrange, because those members are often volunteers from a local veterans organization such as the American Legion or the Veterans of Foreign Wars. The funeral director will know which posts nearby provide them.

Where honors are rendered

Usually at the graveside, as part of the committal. Where there is no graveside service they can be rendered at the church or the funeral home, though a rifle volley needs to be outdoors.

Honors do not depend on a casket. After a cremation they are rendered at the memorial service, with the folded flag placed beside the urn, and that service can be held weeks or months later if the family needs the time.

What to tell the people attending

• Everyone stands for the honors, if they are able.
• Veterans and service members may salute. Everyone else places a hand over the heart during Taps.
• The volley is loud. Tell anyone with small children, and anyone who may be startled by gunfire, before it happens. A line in the program is enough.

Common questions

Does the family pay for any of this? No. Honors, the flag, the certificate and the marker are provided without charge.

Can honors be declined? Yes. They are rendered only when the family asks. Some veterans leave instructions either way, so check for a written wish before deciding.

What if we are told no detail is available? Ask about the minimum. The two-person detail with the flag and Taps is what the law provides for, and it is rarely refused. It is the additional elements that depend on who is available.